Continuing the key principles / character traits within the field of dating and attraction. As a reminder: Ideally you really want develop them, not just pretend to possess them. Let’s look at the next one and how to apply it on a first date:

Charme

In dating, being charming, keeps you out of the asshole category. Especially, if you tease a lot in a cocky way.

Your date should associate you with feeling good. So make her smile, by the things that you say and the things that you do. Show her, that you care about her as a person, not only her body and looks.

Having said that, it’s okay to show her, that you‘re interested in her, that you want her. However it‘s not beneficial, if you appear like you need her. Being desperate, being needy; is one of the most unattractive traits that you can show a woman.

Simply aim to have fun. Love is playful. Keep the conversation light and relaxed. Avoid serious subjects in the beginning. Sometimes hard for me. Being typically German, I can be a bit of a serious guy and I also just like deep talk. If you’re anything like that, you can always go back to spark the right vibe again on a date, simply by teasing her.

Be careful with compliments and only say them, if really mean it. Otherwise you risk coming accross like a super-pleaser or like you rely on bribery to obtain sexual favors. #sexthroughbribery

Stay fully focused on her, keep eye contact and, of course, don‘t check out other women, while being on the date with her. If that‘s challenging for you, already stop looking at other women on the way to your date.

In general you don‘t need to appear perfect on a date. You are even more charming, if you’re able to laugh about yourself and show signs of vulnerability occasionally(!). Show small details of your personality. But ideally only as brief glimpses of your soul in between.

As the teasing is only 10 to 20 percent of the time, the rest of the time you focus on building rapport, you listen attentively and ask great questions. Regarding the latter ideally something that connects to her emotions. For example, how she felt during an event in her life, that she mentions.

So if you want my help for your personal challenges, just go on my website, mathiasrabe.com, and book a 1 on 1 coaching session with me.

Thank you for your trust, lots of success, bye for now.